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New Year, New Decade, New Intentions (not goals!)

New Year, New Decade, New Intentions (not goals!)



Yesterday, you might have caught my blog post where I rambled on about being more mindful on why we create goals, not feeling pressure to set goals because they sound ~impressive~, and not give into heteronormativity and capitalism when we are trying to work out where we want to go with our lives.

Now, despite that ramble, I am still routine-orientated so like to know what's coming up. Always have been and I don't think my personality will ever be void of that. For the past month now I have been trying to take stock of where I am and where I want to be - and exactly how I'm going to get there. I don't know the answer to that question, but at the start of every year, I take a good stab at them. So here it goes: What I'm hoping to achieve in 2020.

Domestic and Home Life


In 2019, one of my priorities was to become more domesticated. I successfully did that. I now have favourite cleaning products that I swear by, iron my bedsheets, and even kept a plant alive! I would say that's a far cry from who I was just a year ago. I have identified areas for improvement though, and key things I want to start working on in my domesticated life in 2020 and beyond include:

  • buy more plants (and keep them alive)
  • re-start my balcony garden
  • shampoo my white rug on a more regular basis
  • buy a steam mop and carpet cleaner machine
  • create more of a scent in the house (Candles, reed diffusers etc)
As far as cooking went, I made leaps and bounds in 2019. I don't have any particular goals here, I just want to keep trying new recipes and finding new ones to put on my list for special occasions. 

Oh, and keep saving to buy my own place (but only buy it when I'm ready). 

Style and Beauty

Hahaha hahaha. This is the one area of my life I made very little progress with during 2019. I'm generally quite happy with how I present myself to the world, but there were things I wanted to change last year and never got round to. Here's the list again: 

  • industrial piercing
  • another tattoo (I have three ideas in my head)
  • more permanent hair removal (I've had some laser on my bikini line)
  • teeth whitening and potentially cosmetic braces
I received an Iolla gift voucher for Christmas so expect a second pair of glasses at some point this year to mix and match with! 

Social Justice & Activism

In 2019 I made an intention to become more involved in the Scottish Green Party (which I have been a member of since 2014!). I did just that and was elected onto the Glasgow Committee in autumn as an Ordinary Member. Since then I've focused on communications and look after the branch's Facebook page. One of my main intentions for 2020 is to work really hard at this role and do my best work possible, treating it as though it was a job.

The only other area of activism I want to work on is focusing on a zero-waste lifestyle. I have purchased several reusable household items to replace items that were once single-use (cloth sanitary towels, a metal straw that I keep on me, a tote bag that lives in my main handbag, and reusable cloth make-up pads). I think I have everything covered, but I'm planning to ensure that I've left no gaps. 


Geek and Pop Culture


2019 was a good year for books, movies, comics, and tv shows. I have no particular goals for this area of my life other than to just keep going. 

Online life and blogging


This is the one area of my life that I'm always developing - and 2020 looks to be no different.  I've set the bar quite high, so it's probably a good thing I spent a lot of 2019 reevaluating where my energy goes as I'm going to be quite busy. 

Firstly, I made a decision on Christmas Eve that I definitely want to start creating paid content. I've been supporting some of my favourite creators on Patreon for two years (and occasionally on Ko-Fi) because creatives deserve to be paid, and it's better if they're paid by fans rather than brands (who might try and edit their message). But I didn't believe I was ~popular~ enough to justify creating my own Pratreon, even if I do have some loyal people who consistently say they love my content. On Christmas Eve I said fuck that self-depreciated way of thinking, and on Boxing Day I set up my very own Patreon (where you can support me via subscription from only $2 a month - and gain access to more content) and Ko-Fi (where you can throw me the odd bit of money whenever you want). Maybe this will flop, or maybe I'll end up dirty rich. But I won't know unless I try (please pay me).

Any money I earn from Patreon and Ko-Fi, however, won't immediately go into my own pocket. I'll be using some of it to help pay for some of the other projects I'm trying to get off the ground (because, believe it or not, creative projects require funding).

First off, I am bringing the @CfbloggersChat back from the dead - but not as a Twitter chat. For those of you who weren't around in 2014, I and a few other bloggers started a Twitter chat for cruelty-free bloggers. Eventually, I was the last one standing and it was too much by myself. I also couldn't be magically free every Thursday, so the chat fell. I never missed having to be on my phone every single Thursday, but I did miss the community. Halfway through 2019, I realised that I could bring it back as something else (i.e. something that didn't require me to be free every Thursday). It's now a community and collective with an active Twitter account, Facebook Page, and Facebook Group (please follow and join us). I'm hoping to get a website, podcast, and Instagram up and running in the next few months.

My other big, new project is the thing I've been speaking about on Twitter since summer: my podcast about all things bisexual. I was gifted a podcast microphone by my parents for Christmas, so I'm guessing there are no excuses now? It's called The B Agenda (it was almost Bisexuals on Buses, which I'm still toying with) and each episode I'll be inviting a fellow bisexual to chat about a different subject. I already have my logo and microphone, but I still have to work on a few things over the next wee while before I get it 100% up and running.

I think it's also time I paid a photographer to take some nice lifestyle shots of me posing on a street or in a studio.

Social Life and Relationships

I feel like not much has changed in this area of my life since the start of 2019. Romantically, I'm still single and I don't have my eye on anyone. I did pay for Tinder and Bumble pro over the course of last year - because it doesn't actually cost that much - which, if anything, has only made my use of the apps more efficient. And I get to see who has liked me in advance, which is hilarious when you see people you know!

[content warning for sexual assault]

Platonically, I've had a few shifts but nothing too note-worthy. Back in January, an ex-friend was released from prison a year early and I saw how many people still believed his story (it was sexual assault, two women came forward, it was a conviction, and he was always a bit creepy....not much wiggle room for innocence) which was a bit gutting as I realised some people really had to be kicked out of my life for good. That wasn't fun. But aside from that my friendships have remained solid.

[end content warning for sexual assault]

In 2019, I tried to be more mindful of my socialising and not attending events that weren't essential to maintaining my important relationships. The biggest example was skipping my employer's company-wide Christmas party in December. I didn't skip it because I hate the people I work with; I simply didn't fancy it. I instead went to the Scottish Green Party Winter Social, which was much more me (and even if that hadn't been on, I would have skipped the big work party anyway).

In 2020, I want to further explore Relationship Anarchy. Primarily I want to be there for my (close) friends in a way that we usually associate with familial or romantic relationships. Whether it's providing financial support (either in a big way like helping them if they lose their job or paying for a friend's coffee if they earn less) or if they are going through a period of ill health (taking them to appointments, visiting regularly in hospital). When you write this out it does seem so bizarre that we don't already do this? Why don't we pull our weight for our friends as much as we do for romantic partners and family members? Obviously, I will be having chats with my close friends to see if they're happy with this (some romantic couples keep finances separate, my friends might want to remain financially independent from me).

Career & Work


I'll be re-applying for university but for a slightly different course - and I've worked on ways to improve my application. Fingers crossed.

In other exciting (and expensive) news, one of my favourite content creators/wellness writers, Melissa A Fabello, launched a course on Breaking Into Freelance Writing and I've signed up! I've been a fan of Melissa's work for years and she gives me extreme career envy. Clearly, I'm going to want to learn from her. I can't wait to get stuck in during the first half of the year.

--

I think that's enough to keep me busy!

P.S. I'm turning 30 in November. Eek!




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morag | mo adore
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A ramble on goals, capitalism, a new decade, heteronormativity, and turning 30...the fun stuff.

A ramble on goals, capitalism, a new decade, heteronormativity, and turning 30...the fun stuff.




In case you haven't heard, it's a new decade and it's time for a new start. What have you achieved in the past decade? What will you achieve in the next decade you underperforming failure of a human?!>!!

Meh. 

My little space on the internet was born as part of a New Year's resolution in 2011, and in a few days, my blog will celebrate its ninth birthday. If my blog was a person it would be halfway through primary school. 

Those of you who have been with me since the start of mo'adore will know that my attitude towards goals and resolutions has changed wildly. I used to be very goal orientated. I was a preachy goal-maker who would look down her nose at people who had no drive. These days, I still work hard and shit but I've shredded the internalised belief that a higher level of productivity automatically makes someone a more worthwhile human being.  

There's nothing wrong with having goals, as long as you aren't doing them out of societal obligation. I still like to sit down at the turn of every new year and stake stock of where I am, decide if I am happy with where I am, and what to do about the bits that aren't too peachy. 

That tradition has never changed. These days though, I like to check in with myself about why I want to achieve each thing, as well as focusing on working on myself to be a better human rather than a mo productive part of the capitalist machine.

--

At the start of 2019, several of my plans were a bit dull if I'm being honest. I decided I wanted to become more domesticated in 2019. This I achieved. I'm now a full-blown Zoflora wanker who irons her bedsheets. I even bought a plant that I've managed not to kill. 

I liked achieving this goal because it's nice to come home to a clean house after a day at work. It's good for the soul (and my nostrils). I also cooked a lot of food in 2019, and have several new recipes that I can turn to for particular situations. That's nice too. Though I totally did mutilate my attempt at steamed buns. 

I also said that I would continue to save money so that I could buy my own flat. I haven't bought my own flat yet and my savings are still about the same. This is something I've had to learn to be okay with. I could buy right now if I wanted to, as my savings are high enough. But I got very lucky with my rented flat and I'd have to massively downgrade (and move further out of the city) if I bought now. While there are pros to buying now, ultimately I think I'd be less happy if I bought now - even if I would receive some congratulations cards in the post. Originally I had a plan to buy before I'm 30 and unless I happen to win the lottery before November, I'm unlikely to achieve that. But recently I've had to ask myself why I set myself the goal of buying by 30. There's no logical reason as to why I need a mortgage by this age. I just randomly came up with it, due to societal pressure.

(Side note: it drives me nuts on Tinder when people brag about being homeowners on their profiles - don't get me wrong it is nice to own and I certainly wouldn't complain if someone I was dating had a nice pad, but it makes you sound like a snobby Tory)

Style-wise I wanted to upgrade myself. I haven't done this, largely because of money. I don't have any new tattoos and piercings. The one major change in my appearance is that I became a specky - and splashed out on a pair of Michael Kors glasses that look really nice on my face.

I also gave up drinking (aside from special occasions) which wasn't a goal I decided on at the start of the year, but something I decided on in September. I woke up after a friend's birthday feeling pretty shit and unable to do anything that day. I had a bit of a realisation that I hadn't been able to do much of what I really wanted to recently because I had been on one too many nights out and had lost several days to hangovers. My reasons for giving up drinking centred around productivity and being mindful of where my time went, but I've still had to deal with ignorant a******* who can't just let me live. 

I did achieve something quite big but I wanted to recap on these boring goals for a bit. None of the above goals are particularly brag-worthy and the house-cleaning one did get me a few eye-rolls. No one is congratulating me on developing a cleaning schedule that works for me (though I'd appreciate it if they did).  

That's the thing about goals though: they should concentrate on things that make you happy. Having a cleaner house has improved my emotional wellbeing. Even if it doesn't found as fancy as "completed a PhD" or "had a baby". 

I would say over the course of the past year I didn't really achieve that much. There is one stand out achievement that did earn me congratulations on Twitter (I'll get to it) but I wouldn't say it *means more* to me that getting on top of my chores. 

Okay, so my stand-out achievement that made my parents squee in delight? I was elected onto the Glasgow Green Party Committee as an Ordinary Member. This is something that I am obviously delighted about, and I am proud of myself for putting myself forward (which was a bit scary because it involved standing on a stage and selling myself to a room full of people). I am not in any way shape or form downplaying this achievement, but what I am saying is that it's not necessarily more important to me just because it looks a bit better on social media than my other achievements (like learning how to make vegan meringues from chickpeas). 

Honestly, if I was to wrap up my 2019: it would be the year of rejection and things not working out. In my 2019 goals post, I mentioned that I wanted to get the wheels in motion for a career change. I applied for a Masters and didn't get in, which obviously blew (especially since two of my friends did get onto their chosen masters). 

I also said that I wanted to take dating more seriously, which I did and I'm still partnerless. When I wrote my 2019 blog post I actually had a crush on someone I knew in real life. In the spring I decided to shoot my shot and....it didn't work (though we are still friends which I am very grateful for *woo maturity points*). I gave love a chance on a few other occasions this year, more than any other year. While it didn't work out for me with any of these people, I can safely say that it was never meant to be. I also paid for Tinder Pro and can see when people I know in life have swiped right on me (lol). 

Oh, and I went on a dating show! Which is a very bizarre sentence that I didn't exactly imagine myself writing at the start of the year. It's still in the editing phase and should be out on iPlayer in spring. It's called Hot Property and the picker (who was not me) picks a date based on their bedrooms. So you'll all get to see what my bedsheets look like. Maybe my vibrator too. 

I did say that I wanted to be more vulnerable in 2019, and appearing on a dating show where the person rummages through your drawers is high-stakes vulnerable. Yay for vulnerability and not being scared of what people might say about you on national TV! I'm still tempted to have a close friend watch the show for me and make the call on whether watching it myself would be good for my emotional health. 

The thing is: I put myself out there more this year than in previous years, which meant that I faced more rejection than in previous years. I think I'm okay with this...as it means I know certain things weren't for me and I won't wonder if things were meant to be? Something like that. I'm still working on being okay with my failed attempt at uni and love.

-- 

But when we talk about 2020 goals, we're not just talking about the upcoming year. No! We're talking about the decade. And as a 1990 baby, it will be a new decade for me personally. I find decade goals weird because who knows what the fuck I'm going to want in five years time. I might decide to uproot and move to France (unlikely). Or I might decide to become an engineer (also unlikely). Or global warming will finally catch us and we'll all be dead (likely). 

The only thing I do know that I want to achieve in the next decade is a career change. I never planned to end up in marketing; it sort of just happened because when you leave school you pick something and get on with it. I don't hate it, but I've always had a niggling suspicion that it's not the thing I was meant to do. In the past year, I've identified something that seems a lot more "me" but it's an industry that can be very difficult to succeed in and there are not a lot of positions available in Scotland (though remote working is possible). I applied for university and didn't get in, but I've been working on a plan to boost my chances of getting in next year.



I shared the above image on my Facebook in August. It spoke to me because of the career aspect. I graduated at 21 with a degree I was always a bit iffy about, tried to make it work, but as I approach 30 I have decided that I really need to have a re-think. But I was conscious of people thinking I might have been trying to gather sympathy for my long-term single status. 

If you've been around since the start of mo'adore, you'll know that I've been single the whole time. There are a handful of personal reasons for this: including being in the closet, having emotional issues in my early 20s that I had to work through first, and (the main one) I just never met someone. I am okay with this, but it feels weird to say it out in loud (in public) that if I don't mean someone by October then I will have been officially single for a decade. 

One of my favourite books of this year was The Unexpected Joy of Being Single by Catherin Gray. Like me, she is a long-term single and had a lot of baggage she needed to address before meeting someone. One of the most poignant parts of the book was where she explained that most of us could be married by now if we really wanted to be. I could have stayed with my first boyfriend even though he made me angry on a weekly basis, or I could have agreed to be the girlfriend of the multiple men who have tried to convince me. But I walked away from every offer because it would have been the wrong choice. If I had stayed, sure, I'd be married but I'd probably also be miserable. 

Just like owning a house, I could do it if I really wanted to because it would make me look more put together on social media, but it would actually be the wrong choice in terms of my personal happiness. 

--

Just before I turned 20 (in 2010) I went through both a romantic and platonic break-up (both on very bad terms), wasn't eating very well, was very skinny (some people complimented me on on this!), still pretending that cheerleading was a thing I was into, awkward as fuck and was wanting to leave university. I was fucking miserable. But it was this misery that led me to finally starting the slow journey of finding happiness. 

Finding that happiness wasn't a linear process. It was made up of lots of little projects and lifestyle changes. Going vegetarian, finding my own personal style, ditching shit friends, finding better friends, moving to Glasgow, and - of course - coming out as bisexual. All these things lifted me to a higher level of life satisfaction that passing my driving test first time never did (I also never drove again).

When people on Twitter were talking about what they achieved in the past decade, it was usually getting published in a newspaper, finishing their degree, getting married, having a baby, or buying their first house. While these are great things to have achieved (if these things are right for you), they are very capitalist and heteronormative goals. They are not right for everyone and no one should feel bad for not having achieved those things.

I have people in my life who struggle with health problems, some of who are legally recognised as disabled. They haven't achieved a lot of the things above as they have to battle their own mind and body on a daily basis, let alone finish a degree or hold down a job. As much as I am proud of the people in my life who have received pay rises or bought a house this year, I will always be more proud of my loved ones whose biggest success this year was just staying alive, holding down a job, or attending all their therapy appointments.

My proudest achievement in the past decade? If you've read everything I've written in the past two years you'll already know: it was coming out as bisexual. In an ideal world, learning to love myself would have never been my proudest achievement because I should have never been to feel like I had to the fact that I can fall in love with women. 

I'm closing the decade as a happy human, who is largely content with her life, who has grown to love herself and accept that she likes girls (along with boys and non-binary people). 

My goals for the next decade, and my thirties when November hits, is to continue pursuing happiness and striving towards things that feel right in my gut. Not goals that society places on me.

Isn't that what we should all be aiming towards? 
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morag | mo adore
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“I’m sorry, I’m at full capacity right now”...let’s chat boundaries in a friendship

“I’m sorry, I’m at full capacity right now”...let’s chat boundaries in a friendship




If, like me, you love a bit of the good old Twitter you’ve probably noticed a screenshot floating around of a message exchange between two friends, asking if they had the emotional capacity for a vent. Innocent enough to be honest. This tweet, however, has caused a massive onslaught of divided opinion on whether friends should be available 24/7 for a vent or if we should be more considerate about what else could be going on in other people’s lives.

The tweet originated from US-based activist and writer, Melissa A Fabello. I’ve been a massive fan of Melissa’s work for many years, so much so that I support her on Patreon and have recently signed-up (and paid) for her Writing Course. I still remember stumbling across her old YouTube videos five years ago and falling down a massive rabbit hole. In fact, a lot of her online content has helped me become the person I am - so if you’re a fan of who I am, then you’ve got to give some credit to Melissa.

To see her ripped apart across the internet has felt weird as someone who credits her work as a major influence in my life. I do not know Melissa personally and can’t give a real-world account of what she is like to be around, but I can certainly say that her work has changed me for the better. Personal feelings aside, I’m going to give my fair and balanced opinion on the meme itself, setting boundaries in relationships (both romantic and platonic) and respecting people’s mental capacity to provide emotional support.

Melissa has spoken before about asking permission from people before dropping heavy shit on them (and understanding the difference between a friend and a therapist) so to me, this tweet didn’t seem particularly out of place. It’s a little formal and dry, yes, but the point is made, and if it’s an exchange between two friends they will likely customise it.

For just under a year, I have been making a conscious effort to ask someone “hey is it okay if I rant about my body image issues/a bad date/work to you right”. I understand that people have bad days, might be in the middle of a family gathering, or might be having a mental health flair up. Sometimes things happen where people can’t be there for you emotionally, just like people can’t always show up physically for you.

I do have friends with more emotional energy to give than others. That doesn’t mean that the friends with lower levels of emotional energy are worse friends than those who have a high tolerance. I personally do have a high tolerance for emotional stuff, and it’s very rare that I feel overwhelmed by emotional topics. Saying that though, I do get under the weather sometimes and just last weekend I did find myself having one of those days where I just lay in bed and aimlessly scrolled Facebook because I hadn’t had the best week.

Despite having a high threshold for emotionally-driven conversations, my threshold for in-person chat is very low. I am very introverted and can feel socially drained extremely easily (if you know me in real life you have probably noticed that my Tweets are much more invigorating than the awkward murmurs that come out of my mouth in person). This does mean that I might not be the most socially-available friend, even if I am quite quick at responding on Messenger. I would never, however, use this as an excuse to miss an important event such as a friend’s wedding or birthday party. I’d always suck those up. But as anyone who knows me quite well cab attest to, being around people too much can bring out the cranky side of me and it’s best for the health of my relationships that I’m given physical and social space when needed.


The importance of a support network

One thing that has really helped me manage my own emotions over the years and be there for other people, has been building a support network of people rather than expecting one or two people to fulfil every social and emotional need I have. Growing up we’re usually sold the idea of having a Best Friend who will be glued to our side, and then as we get older we will find a spouse (of a romantic and sexual nature) who will then become our everything.

I threw that idea out the window a long time ago and I am much happier because of it.

Having a support network means that I have different people who can show up for me in different ways. If someone isn’t feeling okay I have other people I can turn to. For example, just last weekend I was in a bit of a state because I received a few emotional hits that week - and different friends showed up for me in different ways. I also tweeted about one of the things that happened and received some Twitter support. Support can show up in numerous ways.

When I go on dates (I know I’m not the best person to dish out relationship advice) something I look out for is “does this person have a lot going on on?” or in other words: will this person expect me to be their everything because, to be frank, they have fuck all else going on? Couples who spend every waking and breathing moment together are welcome to do so - I’m not saying that relationship style is necessarily wrong - but it does confuse me how they...cope. I know from personal experience that having a partner who is constantly there with only the odd break for work commitments brings out a less pleasant side of me.

People are not bad friends or partners if they have boundaries

A lot of responses that Melissa received were telling her that she was a bad friend. I don’t know Melissa personally so cannot comment on what it’s like to be her friend. However, I have been following her online for years and she certainly appears to have a solid group of friends and acquaintances. She also has two romantic partners who come across as high calibre (tell me your dating secrets, Melissa!). I can also say that applying the practical advice from her educational content on forming healthy friendships has improved my own friendships for the better...so I’m inclined to say that she's not an awful friend.

Here’s the thing: if you want a relationship of any kind (platonic, romantic or familial) to survive long term then you have to respect the boundaries and limitations of that person. That person is not superhuman, and they have a breaking point. Sometimes you need to check in with them to know where their emotional capacity is currently at.

It’s happened a few times where I’ve been so close to my social capacity that I need alone time for the sake of my own emotional wellbeing (and the emotional wellbeing of the people around me). I’m a fairly mild-mannered person who doesn’t have a quick temper, but anyone who has decided to ignore my requests for privacy and alone time will know what it’s like to be on the wrong side of me. I’m not kidding: when someone pushes past my social boundaries - especially when I’ve explicitly stated them and we’re not in a social situation that I need to suck up e.g. an emergency or a family wedding - it will not be greeted well and, yes, I have been known to split open emotionally and let the irritation and anger spill out.

This breaking point could have been easily avoided if the person in question had just, you know, respected my (very basic) social boundaries. Healthy relationships with minimal arguments need an element of boundaries to stay healthy. 


You’re not entitled to anyone

The conversation around feeling entitled to a romantic and sexual partner has increased over the past year or so - and that’s great! Though we’re not seeing much chat surrounding feeling entitled to a platonic partner.

Bottom line: you’re not entitled to anyone's time. Being in a relationship with someone (platonic, romantic, sexual, business or whatever) doesn’t entitle you to potentially push them towards their breaking point (which could be the reality of springing heavy chat on someone without warning, or showing up uninvited). Unless you’re a newborn baby who literally needs the adults to do everything for you, then ask permission now and then.

We, as a society, have a problem with the word no. I love the word no now but it took me years to learn to use it and to respect it when it came out of other people’s mouths. I might be all BOUNDARIES now but I also had to work on respecting boundaries over the years and meeting people in the middle. People have the right to say no to things. Including those closest to you.

Though you do need to suck it up sometimes

I never use my introverted personality to get out of social situations that are important to my closest people. Of course, I will always attend family weddings and birthdays unless there’s a very good reason to miss it (and by important, I mean an emergency, pre-booked holiday or health-related issue). But I will say no to non-important things. For example, I skipped my work’s company-wide Christmas party because, truthfully, I just didn’t fancy it. This did get a few negative reactions but I’m entitled to spend my time the way I wish and it’s not an important event that is important to someone I love.

While people are entitled to spend their time how they like, people are also allowed to decide how available they need their friends to be in order for them to feel loved. There is no right or wrong here. Personally, despite my introverted energy, I still think friendships need to have regular mate dates to last. Friendships where someone is having health or monetary problems, someone has children or care responsibilities and/or there’s a geographical difference are the exception. However, in a friendship where none of these issues apply I would expect there to be regular mate-dates.

That’s not to say every friendship needs regular mate dates or that I have some stringent Google Calendar where everyone has a regular appointment slot. Some people are happy to have digital friendships with people they rarely see (again: I do have friendships like this but it’s where there is a boundary that prevents us hanging out in real life).

As I mentioned earlier, I get second-hand stress from couples who are glued together. That’s not to say however that those relationships are wrong. For some people, a very present partner might be important. For me, it’s important that a romantic partner has a life outside the relationship.

I don’t see romantic relationships are exceptionally more important than a platonic relationship. Imagine dating someone who only communicated with your digitally and never made the effort to take you on a date? Every guide on the internet would be telling you to leave. I’m not entirely sure why friendships are different (unless of course, there’s a boundary in the way). I have a friendship where we have so much in common that we regularly see each other more than once a week, and I’ve been asked a few times if she’s my girlfriend! I think that’s a little sad that people jump to the idea that we’re a romantic couple for no other reason than we spend a lot of time in each other’s company!

But anxiety

There has been one argument against the original tweet that I think does have some weight. And that’s the argument that people with anxiety (or even just anxious personalities) might panic when they receive a message that warns them of potentially triggering content and their minds might begin racing in a thousand different directions.

Here’s my advice: talk to your friends about the way in which they like to be communicated with. You might have some friends who would prefer you straight up dish out your problem immediately with no warning, while others might prefer a warning (I prefer a warning). No one is right or wrong here; different people just have different ways in which they like to be communicated with. I, for one, am not particularly comfortable with phone calls unless it is 1) scheduled and 2) with someone I am close to. I also don’t answer phone numbers that I don’t recognise.

(On a serious note - content warning for creepy and stalker behaviour - I don’t answer my door if I’m not expecting anyone because of some creepy behaviour in my past from people who know where I live)

I also have some friends that I’m more huggy with than others. Some friends attend concerts with me while others can’t think of anywhere else. It’s called boundaries and it’s worth having a chat with your closest people about where their boundaries on certain situations and communication channels lie. And, tbh, if you’re having to drag people to events that aren’t up their street...maybe you and your friends don’t really have all that much in common.

Some people are just not well-suited to each other

It took me until my mid-twenties to really understand this, but ...sometimes it’s not that people are shit friends, selfish, or cranky bastards with no love to give….it’s that maybe...you’re just not well-suited.

There’s nothing wrong with a low-key life, but I’ve learned over the years that I struggle with building long-term relationships with people like that because I keep a busy schedule and we just don’t understand each other. I also don’t gel very well with people who are extremely loud; but being loud isn’t a character flaw, it’s just not what I naturally feel at home with. The same way that some people won’t like my quiet energy and think that I “lock myself away”. I do have to meet people in the middle on “how often should we spend time together” question but then other times friendships fall through we’re just too incompatible. We all have different needs and sometimes two people aren’t built in a compatible way. That’s okay


Different people have different needs


Some of us need trigger warnings. Some of us don’t. Some of us like relationships where we are glued together. Some people like their space. No one is right or wrong.

That goes for the now infamous tweet. Was that person wrong to ask if someone had the emotionally capacity for a vent? No, they weren’t. But is it for everyone? Also, no.

Have a chat with your friends and find out where their boundaries are. Believe me, your friendships will be better when you learn to love people in the way that need to be loved. 
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The UK is now a Tory heartland - where do we go from here?

The UK is now a Tory heartland - where do we go from here?





I don’t think I need to tell you why I spent an hour this morning crying like a fucking baby.

It wasn’t even just the fact that a party whose austerity measures have killed 120,000 people according to Medical Journals managed to win (in a First Past the Post system) by a landslide. It’s also that I don’t really…understand. I can’t articulate what happened. I’m an over-thinker and if I don’t have an answer to something, I’ll find one. My brain usually creates one, but my brain isn’t getting any further than “some people really do like the idea of Brexit, aye?” The polls said the Tories would probably win it, but that a hung parliament was likely. Boris is a racist, a homophobe, and a snob who wouldn’t even agree to TV interviews (I might not agree with the other Tory MPs but at least they’ve never hidden in a fridge).

If you’re here for a hot take on what went wrong, I don’t have one. My brain is fried from all of this (and I was up all night at the Glasgow count). My only conclusion is that we (including myself) underestimated just how many people wanted Brexit (given that the Conservatives made gains in places with a high Leave vote). What I am going to talk about is what we do moving forward.

But, hey, at least Jo Swinson lost her seat (but I was in the fucking toilet when it happened!).

If you have a political party that you truly believe in, join them

I’ve been a member of the Scottish Green Party for over 5 years. Not only that, but I was elected onto the Glasgow Greens Committee as an Ordinary Member a few months ago. If you join a political party, you don’t need to be as involved as I am. Plenty of members just donate their yearly fee to help with the finances. If you do want to get involved though, there are plenty of ways to do so as political parties and their local branches need a variety of skills sets. This includes marketers, data analysts, election organisers, candidates (!!), secretaries, event organisers, treasurers and confident extrovert types to knock on doors!

Or join a campaign or pressure group

They also need people with a variety of skill sets. 

Consider donating time and money

I still 100% believe that you should be talking to your friends and family about their vote. This includes posting on social media. Saying that, unless you are a public figure or influencer with a wide reach, you might only change the minds of a handful of people.

I know not everyone can, but if you’re in a financially comfortable situation please consider donating money to your candidate or party of choice in the next election - in order to help reach a wider audience. If you also have a particular skill set that could be of use during a political campaign, get in touch with your local organiser to find out how you can get involved.

Don’t think Scottish independence is in the bag

I’ve seen a lot of posts on social media today claiming that Scottish independence is now inevitable.
Hold on a second.

The SNP did make big gains last night in terms of the number of seats won – but their share of the vote was 45%. While this is an impressive number, it isn’t high enough to start running around screaming Freedom. 

I support Scottish Independence and in the event of a referendum being called, I will 100% be out campaigning. With a smart campaign, the Yes side may swing it (and remember, we only need to convince the electorate once, Better Together need to keep convincing voters over and over).

I know the thought of Scottish Independence is what’s keeping people going right now. Unfortunately, this could lead to complacency where we think we’re going to fix this mess by leaving. It’s not that simple. Public opinion still looks like it hovers around the 50% mark.

If you want independence, you'll need to restart the campaign. Don't wait for it a new Independence Referendum to be announced either. A lot of Scottish people still need convincing (more on that later!).

Start laying the groundwork for Holyrood 2021

The next election in Scotland will be Holyrood 2021 (but who knows if another General Election will be called, I’ve voted in more elections in the last few years than I’ve had foreign holidays). The political parties are gearing up for this already, with candidates selected and members collecting voting data at counts across the country. 

The Tory vote share in Scotland last night was 25%. Do not kid yourself if you think Scotland doesn’t like Tories, because they came second in both terms of seats and vote share. We have over a year until we decide who is elected at Holyrood (with a form of proportional representation), and if you want it to be a left-leaning government (yes please) then now is the time to start educating people around your on why the left is best (or donating time and/or money).

Use the time between elections to talk about the issues

One problem I did spot during the campaign period was just how much voters aren’t really clued up on the issues. It’s hard to convince people during a snap General Election on why broadband for all is a good idea, why the Greens are the only party who really have a plan for saving the planet, why Universal Credit must go, that there is a lot of economic research that supports socialism, other countries have already proved that equal societies are possible (English voters were saying that free university tuition is far-fetched despite Scotland having had it for years?), why Trident is a waste of money, why the Monarchy has no place in modern society, and that immigration is not the threat to the working class that they’ve been made to believe that it is.

That’s why, between now and Holyrood 2021, we should be raising awareness of issues and educating those around us. Closer to the time we can start campaigning along party lines, but if we want to reduce the number of Tories in Scotland we need to start shifting public opinion towards the left in general.

Understand the root cause

As I said, I don’t really understand what went wrong last night. In order to fix it though, we need to travel into murky waters to find out. What makes a working-class person vote Tory? Why do people want Brexit, when there is no economic justification for it? Why are people ignoring that we only have 10 years before climate change is irreversible?

One of the biggest shifts in my own personal political beliefs was Scottish Independence. I used to be a hard-lined Unionist (and a Liberal Democrat hahaha hahaha oh god) and changed my mind with only two months to go. Shockingly enough, it was not the Twitter Nats shouting off about Unionists being cowards that made me change my mind (imagine that). It was, and this is random, attending a Republic Scotland debate covering what Scottish Independence could mean for the monarchy. I was really taken by what the Green representative said and that night I walked home feeling the shift in me. I joined the Scottish Greens after the referendum and maybe would have never voted Yes had it not been for the alternative Green Yes campaign. 

Granted, I had been questioning my Unionist beliefs in the months leading up to this (with so much discussion going on around me it was hard not to) but this was the moment where I crossed over the line. Later on in the campaign, the straight-up media bias and lies would become apparent (remember when the BBC claimed that Alex Salmond didn’t answer a question but a foreign journalist uploaded a video of his answer in full?) and I was a Yes for good. Nothing was going to convince me otherwise after that.

One of the reasons the Yes campaign was so successful (it might not have won but it did rapidly increase the support for Yes) was that it covered everything. There was the white paper, the tv debates, books, the Green Yes campaign, Radical Independence, English for Yes, and the other offshoots that represented different demographics. Almost no stone was left unturned. It wasn’t enough to convince everyone, but it turned this once staunch Unionist into a Yes voter. 

As someone who knows what's like to switch sides on a massive issue, I can tell you a few things. Don't be a dick to people. Share your opinions in a well-researched manner. Understand why people vote the way they do and then build a campaign around it.

Look after our most vulnerable

I want to pay more tax. I’ll happily take home slightly less money if it means a fully-functioning NHS, that the Masters I’m thinking of doing can be paid for by the state, cheaper (or free!) public transport, a good care home for my parents (I don’t live near them and can’t look after them myself), and a safety net waiting for me if I was to fall ill and couldn’t work (I have savings that I'd ideally use for buying a flat but I'm still hesitant to part with it in case something happens).

I’m making a commitment to donating to charities and food banks. The extra money that I would pay in tax is still going to be directed towards society’s most vulnerable people. My political opinions are firm on the redistribution of wealth (not that I’m wealthy by any stretch of the imagination, I’m just comfortable) and I’m planning to put my money where my mouth is.
__

I’m not going to pretend that the result of the General Election last night wasn’t fucking disgraceful. It’s disgusting that a large percentage of the UK population (and that includes Scotland!) wants to see disabled people on the streets or children only eating one cooked meal a day.

It doesn’t have to be this way, but if no one takes action (in a strategic way) then this is very much the future we are looking at. Start having a think about where you can help the cause in your own beautiful way: whether that's through using your expertise in your profession to pen thought-pieces, talking openly about how Tory rule has impacted you, donating money to a campaign you really care about, sharing your skillset with a campaign group or political party, volunteering at a local charity or your community council. 

It's bleak right now, very fucking bleak. But it's been bleaker before and society has - in many ways - made leaps and bounds even in my own lifetime. It's not over yet.  

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morag | mo adore
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Why Scottish Green Party supporters don't owe the SNP their vote

Why Scottish Green Party supporters don't owe the SNP their vote




My Twitter feed has been filled with politics recently, and with good reason. The UK is having a General Election on the 12th of December.

This General Election is more crucial than usual due to the looming monsters that are Brexit and the Climate Emergency (you know that in 10 years time climate change will be irreversible, right?). Not to mention that the Tories have thrown some of the UK’s most vulnerable citizens into the gutter.

Oh, and we have a bumbling buffoon as a Prime Minister.

Emotions are high (mine certainly are) and political Twitter has been, shall we say, contentious. It’s darker here than it usually is.

For me personally, the deepest darkness has been from SNP supporters coming out in force to attack the Scottish Green Party for daring to partake in democracy by standing in an election.

Who on earth do we think we are? A political party standing in an election? How preposterous!.

Their argument essentially is “you’re splitting the vote” (with no actual examples or statistics to back it up). I’ve become used to the bile that Twitter nats sprout about the Scottish Green Party over the years, but this time it has been more forceful than usual and has left me shaking in rage.

The thing is: this is a democracy, and if the Scottish Green Party wants to stand then they should. Nobody owes anyone their votes. This includes all parties since I have also spotted Labour voters annoyed at the Liberal Democrats and the SNP, the Tories annoyed at the Brexit Party, and the Scottish Socialist Party voting not to stand candidates to avoid splitting the socialist vote.

But “splitting the vote” is a tired excuse and an affront to democracy, and here are 13 (!!!) reasons why (using the SNP vs Greens as my primary example since that is the debate I’m closer to).


We’re a different party with different policies

This feels like the most obvious point, so I’m going to get it out of the way first.

The Scottish Green Party might agree with the SNP on Scottish independence and Brexit. However, the two parties disagree on a lot of other issues.

First up is climate change. The SNP’s approach to climate change is to do just enough to for some good press and to appeal to voters who think banning plastic straws is the answer (it’s not) - while still keeping their mates in the oil industry happy. Case in point: their recent climate conference was sponsored by BP and Heathrow Airport, those famous beacons of environmental concern.

Very recently, the Scottish Parliament passed a Climate Bill, which was drafted by the SNP and backed by all other parties aside from the Scottish Green Party.  The reason the Scottish Green Party didn’t back it wasn’t because we don’t want to reduce emissions, but because the bill was very weak on how to go about it. Targets can be moved around and while the targets do make good headlines, they don’t mean anything if the SNP keep allowing oil companies to drill in the North Sea.

Nicola, if you’re reading: we’ve only got 10 years to save the world, so get a move on.

The Scottish Greens, on the other hand, have launched the Green New Deal. It focuses not only on reducing emissions but refocusing Scotland’s economy in a way that can save the planet (I repeat: we only have 10 years to fix this) while still protecting workers who make a living in engineering, oil and gas etc. It is based on a report by the New Economics Foundation that is available here.

Another recent example of the Scottish Green Party going up against the SNP is the Gender Recognition Act. The planned update to the Gender Recognition Act 2004 would allow trans people the right to legally self-identify, as opposed to medical professionals deciding for them (a process that many trans people have described as traumatic and stressful).

The SNP shelved it after giving in to pressure from TERFs but that’s not all, they have “gender critical feminists” in their highest ranks, such as MP Joanna Cherry (for Edinburgh South West) and MSP Joan McAlpine (South Scotland region). So much transphobia, that a trans SNP councillor in Dundee quit the party, citing the party’s “institutional transphobia” as his reason (and let’s not forget the problematic Women’s Pledge).

This is in direct contrast to the Scottish Green Party. The Scottish Green Party is committed to the reform of the Gender Recognition Act, and our policies are voted on at our conferences. When Patrick Harvie spoke in support of trans rights in his speech at the Autumn Conference in 2018, the crowd cheered, when we passed a motion supporting trans rights at the same conference, it passed without a blip.

I’m not going to sugar coat this: the SNP’s failure to reform the Gender Recognition has been utterly disgusting. I am a bisexual woman, and I forever and always stand with everyone who falls under the LGBTQI+ banner. That includes trans people, and their right to decide their legal gender for themselves.

The SNP’s treatment of trans people is the number one reason why I can’t just hold my nose and vote for them (especially since I don’t even live in a risky seat, but we’ll get to that). The climate emergency and Scottish independence are both complex matters - politically, scientifically, and economically. There’s a lot to flesh out and it’s going to be a long journey. But respecting a trans person’s right to live their life as their chosen gender? Why is this even up for debate? This isn’t complex economics, this is basic human dignity.

Not that long ago the SNP were standing for Westminster knowing they couldn’t win

The earliest election I ever remember was the 1997 General Election when Tony Blair achieved his landslide. I’m still under 30 so in the grand scheme of things this election wasn’t that long ago.

In that election, the SNP stood 72 candidates but only won 6 seats. In the 1992 General Election, they also stood 71 seats and won 3. Within my own lifetime (and I repeat: I am under 30) I have seen the SNP grow from a fringe party with a handful of seats to a political powerhouse. And you know how they did it? Their own determination for one but also because people were willing to believe in them and voted for them even when they were told that it was a wasted vote. Where would the SNP be if they’d listened to all those Labour campaigners telling them not to split the anti-Tory vote from 1935 until 2015?

The Scottish Green Party are just doing exactly the same thing a generation later and would appreciate the same level of respect.


Scottish Independence isn’t the only issue on the table (and we’re not going to win an independence referendum anytime soon, anyway)

I get it: the SNP’s central policy is Scottish independence and if you’re a candidate, member, or supporter of the SNP then Scottish independence is probably high on your political priorities.

And you have every right to make that choice.

But so does everyone else, and Scottish independence isn’t that important to some voters. Yes, I support it but I have other issues that are more pressing right now (like, uh, stopping the world from imploding). I don’t support Scottish independence in principle. I support it because the UK is a hot mess of a country and I believe that Scotland is being held back by Westminster.

But if the UK stopped being so wild, I’d maybe change my mind. Who knows.

However, the main reason why I’m not putting Scottish independence higher on my priorities is this: we probably wouldn't win a referendum at this point. Polling (depending on who’s doing it) still hovers around the 50% mark. Even if we did get a mandate for a referendum, there’s a real chance that it would still be a no.

We’re going to have to be patient. Support for Scottish independence is higher amongst the younger generation, and it feels naturally inevitable. Yes, support seems to have increased since Brexit but it still isn’t high enough. And if being pulled out of the EU against our will, a blonde rubber duck as a Prime Minister, the Eton elite as his backing dancers, the dismantling of the NHS, and the rise of the far-right still haven’t convinced voters that Scotland is better off as an independent nation - then I’m not entirely sure what will.

You know what is inevitable? The planet overheating. An overwhelming majority of scientists have said that we have 10 years to fix this mess or the damage becomes permanent (and we die). We literally do not have time to be sucking up to the SNP’s mates in BP. There is a deadline here. Scottish independence doesn’t have a deadline. We’ll get it when we get it (which we probably will, eventually, after the planet is officially dying).

And even if we did magically win a referendum, we wouldn’t become independent overnight. The 2014 Independence Referendum had an 18-month campaign period and in the SNP whitepaper, it was suggested that the process of leaving the UK would take 18 months. That then leaves us with 7 years post-independence to save the planet (bearing in mind that even more damage might have occured in that time). Saving the planet will require a complete overhaul of our infrastructure and energy sources. Not a ban on plastic straws or whatever else the faux-eco warriors are suggesting these days. A change in infrastructure is not a simple process and certainly can’t be done overnight. If we want to save the planet, we have to act now (not when we get independence because by that point Scotland might have already sunk into the North Sea).

Before I say my next point I want to make it clear that I say this as a person and not a Scottish Green Party member: I believe that referendums that propose a big constitutional change (such as Scottish Independence and Brexit) shouldn’t rely on a simple majority. If I was in parliament drawing up an independence referendum bill I’d be looking for a supermajority, somewhere between 60-70% of the electorate. Just look at Brexit as an example of what happens when a referendum that demands constitutional reform wins by a small margin.

I’m also going to share a little tidbit about the Scottish Green Party that you might not know about. The Scottish Green Party is officially a Yes Party, by virtue of having voted overwhelmingly in favour of independence multiple times at our conferences. But we are okay with our members voting no. No one will get chucked out if they choose to campaign for Better Together. There are probably a small number of no-voting Greens (albeit I don’t have data) who are very unlikely to vote SNP purely on constitutional grounds, never mind our other points of divergence.

Finally, some people vote SNP because they like the candidate or the party’s social democratic policies. Not necessarily because they want independence. How people decide to vote isn’t as simple as “independence = good, UK = bad”.


The Scottish independence movement needs alternative voices 

I might be pro-Scottish Independence now, but I used to be a hardline Unionist (sad trombone I know). What made me change my mind?

The Green Yes campaign.

I had always found (and still do) the mainstream Yes Campaign to be a bit lacklustre, and only strives for an independent Scotland that would be mildly better than the UK. The Green Yes movement, however, offered a vision of a country that I want to live in - but makes the clear point that Scotland can’t become a progressive beacon for the world while still ruled by Westminster.

If you want the support for independence to grow, you need to stop shouting over the top of other pro-yes voices. The SNP aren’t the only voice in the Scottish Independence movement (and thank god, because some of us would have never been convinced otherwise.)

You lost seats in the last General Election...and the Greens only stood three candidates

I have two tables below showcasing the overall vote share in Scotland in 2015 and 2017 General Elections. Have a look at them.



Do you see it?

Do you see that the SNP lost votes in the 2017 General Election?

Do you see that the Scottish Green Party stood in fewer seats in 2017?

According to SNP Twitter logic, the SNP should have performed better in the 2017 General Election, since the Scottish Green Party were standing in fewer seats and weren’t “splitting the vote”. But that didn’t happen.

What the SNP should be doing right now (instead of harassing Green candidates and voters on Twitter) is working out what went wrong in 2017, so that they can perform better in 2019. Why did you receive fewer votes despite fewer parties standing?

Scotland doesn’t have a big impact on the outcome of elections

It’s well documented that Scotland doesn’t have much of an impact on which party forms the UK government. There are 650 constituencies in the UK, but only 59 are in Scotland. So in percentage terms, that means that only 9% of MPs are elected by Scotland. Even if Scotland sent down 59 SNP MPs something really bizarre would have to happen in the rest of the UK for the SNP to become a Westminster powerhouse.


If you want to block Brexit, Labour is your best bet

Labour can be just as bad as the SNP-ers in regards to complaining about “splitting the vote”. In reality, both parties should respect democracy and campaign on the positives of voting for their party.

However, I can understand Labour’s logic. You can’t vote for the SNP in other parts of the UK, so if you want a pro-Remain majority in the House of Commons, well, it might be best that Scotland holds its nose and sends down 59 Labour MPs.

If the SNP won’t consider standing aside for Labour, then the Scottish Green Party shouldn’t stand aside for the SNP.

(P.S. I wrote this post before there was talk of SNP backing Labour).

Glasgow Central won’t elect a Tory

On a personal level, I live in a constituency where a Scottish Green Party candidate is standing. So I’ll be voting for them and before you claim that I’m splitting the vote, let’s look at some stats from my own constituency.

In the 2017 General Election, the SNP candidate won with 44.7% of the votes. In the 2015 General Election, the same SNP candidate won with 52.5% of the vote. Labour came second in both elections, and then the Conservative party were third (but a very far behind third).

By voting for the Scottish Green Party in Glasgow Central, it’s very unlikely that I’ll be letting a Tory through. In fact, I would pay good money to see a posh Tory knocking on doors in the area I live in.


If Greens can’t vote Green they won’t necessarily vote SNP

First Past the Post is an unfair system that lends its hand to tactical voting. As much as I don’t like tactical voting, I sometimes do it and if I was living somewhere where a Tory might slip through, I’d consider voting for the lesser of the evils (even if it meant not voting Green).

However, my vote might not necessarily go to the SNP.

This is what some SNP-ers don’t seem to grasp: if the Scottish Green Party didn’t stand that doesn’t mean that they’ll vote for the SNP.

Let’s nip back to my own constituency of Glasgow Central. The Scottish Green Party stood someone in the 2015 General Election, but not in 2017. If you were to apply SNP theory, this means that the SNP vote share should have increased because Green voters naturally flock to the SNP when they don’t have a Green candidate on the ballot paper.

Reader, the SNP vote in Glasgow Central dropped by -7.8% between 2015 and 2017. On top of that, the vote share of Labour, Conservatives, and Liberal Democrats all increased. This is despite there being five fewer parties on the ballot paper. Granted the turnout was higher in 2015 (maybe because there was a wider option of candidates and we’d just held the Scottish Independence Referendum?). But their drop in vote share has nothing to do with the Scottish Green Party (because we didn’t even stand).

I’m also going to point out that the Scottish Green Party isn’t standing a candidate in Glasgow North East, a constituency served by Labour MP Paul Sweeney. I feel roughly the same way about Labour as I do the SNP (in that I can tolerate them), but I do have soft spots for certain figures within the party. Paul Sweeney is one of those people. He is a capable politician who shares a lot of my values. I know Greens who live in his constituency who are happy with his performance and intend on voting for him. If I was living in his constituency I’d also be “lending” him my vote.

The Green voice is always important, and it shows people care about climate change

Honestly, I’d be shocked if Glasgow Central sends a Scottish Green MP to Westminster. I’m not going in there actually thinking we’ll actually win.

What having a Scottish Green candidate on the ballot paper (and at debates and at local hustings) does is helps keep green issues on the table for discussion. If people vote for the Scottish Green Party knowing that they can’t realistically win? Well, that just proves that there is an appetite for green policies that can’t be ignored. It might encourage other parties to increase their own commitment to climate change (which no other party is doing).


Keep abusing us on Twitter, and we might not ever vote SNP again 

One of the most common threats I keep seeing on Twitter is that SNP voters will no longer vote for the Scottish Green Party on the Regional List (a few of them have even said they’ll vote for the transphobic Wings Over Scotland instead, Lord give me strength).

That is a risk the Scottish Green Party need to be willing to take.

However, this works both ways. The SNP is sometimes lent votes from the Scottish Green Party supporters. In the 2017 General Election, I voted SNP and I vote for Nicola Sturgeon on my constituency ballot in the Scottish Elections (I have my issues with the SNP as a party, but I believe Nicola to be a solid leader).

The Council Elections have a much fairer voting system where we rank candidates in preference. I always vote Scottish Green Party first (and Allan Young in my Govan ward is a very solid councillor) but after that, all bets are off. Councils have diddly squat influence on Scottish independence and Brexit, so those issues don’t influence my decision in an election about play parks and bins.

Maybe some SNP voters will never “forgive the Scottish Green Party” for potentially splitting a vote. But you know what? The Scottish Green Party candidates and their supporters won’t forget the vile we’ve been receiving on Twitter in a hurry either.

If you want to win, get out there and win fair and square

Sometimes when you’re campaigning for a party, you do need to point out the failures and problematic policies of other parties. In a constructive way. Heck, I do it myself. But, as I said, in a constructive way.

SNP voters: if you want people to vote for you and not the Scottish Green Party explain to us why in a constructive manner. Don’t angry tweet us complaining that it’s personally our fault if Scotland isn’t independent within your preferred timeline.

Scotland voted Remain

It’s well documented that Scotland is being dragged into Brexit by other parts of the UK. As a nation, Scotland largely voted to remain.

So when Scottish voters come at me with “this election is about Brexit and I don’t want to let through a Leave party” I like to remind them that this mess was caused by the other parts of the UK, and Scotland can’t do much about it.

We are relying on England to vote for the Remain parties in order to stop this national embarrassment. Maybe take to Twitter to try and persuade English voters to vote Labour? I’m followed by a lot of English people on Twitter and I regularly post political content that is more relevant to them than my Scottish followers.

The alliance with the Green Party of England and Wales is about cooperation, not shutting someone out

The Liberal Democrats, Plaid Cymru, and the Green Party of England and Wales have created a Remain Pact to keep out MPs who support Brexit and that is great. I am not against it.

(Though I could go on a rant about the Liberal Democrats being untrustworthy).

What makes this different from the Greens “splitting the vote” is that the SNP is not interested in working alongside the Scottish Green Party to keep out Tory voters - they are straight up just telling us not to stand. That is not the same thing as the Remain Pact.

It’s just not democratic

Bottom line: asking a party to stand down because you want their supporters to vote for your party (even though there is no evidence that they would) is a slap in the face to democracy.

If you want your party to win the election, then get out there and earn those votes and if the Scottish Green Party (or whoever else) is “splitting the vote” that you feel undemocratically entitled to, then your party needs to attempt to understand why people would rather vote for them than you (especially if it’s for a party that won’t realistically win).

That’s how democracy works. You’re not entitled to anything.

That includes my vote.

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morag | mo adore
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