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© 2015 mo'adore | Content and design by Morag Lee | Powered by Blogger.

A Single Girl's Take: Why I Don't Hate Valentine's Day


I know this is two days late and you know why that reason may be? Because I had better things to do on Valentine's Day than sit around and moan about how terminally unfair it all is.

I'm single. And in terms of being single on Valentine's Day I haven't been so in three years. Yep, first single valentine's day in three years. First one since my school years in fact.

In the month leading up to this I thought it would be hard to get through. I haven't been single on Valentine's in ages. Plus, both my ex-boyfriend's have new girlfriends and I even got left for one of these girls. But on the eve of Valentine's Day 2011 I decided to fuck it!

I don't hate being single so why do should I hate it on this particular day? The last time I was single properly (which was almost 18 years) I didn't hate - only on Valentine's Day.

Part of this revelation came from seeing the negative status about Valentine's Day popping up. This provided a mirror reflection. Why do we hate Valentine's Day simply if we don't have someone? Why do we hate being single?

I think it's down to insecurity and a lack of love for yourself.

Letting your self-worth be decided on whether or not someone else is in love with you. Rather than if you love yourself. Don't have someone special? Celebrate how awesome you are. Share your love for your family. You may not be in a relationship, but you still have other relationships that need to be nourished. Including the one you have with yourself. That's the most important one. Lovers and friends may come and go but the one constant relationship you'll have is the one with yourself. Therefore it needs to be maintained.

Moaning about being single is a sign of insecurity. The insecurity that no one else loves you enough to be yours. And insecurity ain't attractive. For me a guy moaning about being single is a deal-breaker. I'm put right off. I want a guy that's secure in his own shoes; with his own ambitions and life. A lover should "compliment you, not complete you - you should be complete first". The guy I was seeing last month moaned about being single every second day - he even seemed to think it was a universal thing. It put me off. When I'm pursued by a guy I want it to be because he thinks I'm the best girl in the world and thinks I'd compliment his life perfectly, not because he has some empty void in his life that he thinks I'll fill by agreeing to go out with him. My heart is worth more than that.

So what did my first single Valentine's Day in three years consist of? Helping with a charity bake sale for my university's RAG society, a library session for my class test next Thursday and then watching Anchorman at my university cinema, again for charity. Then ended the day at my Student's Union with some male friends practising our Ahh-ooo chants for the cinema showing of 300 on Thursday (mine was rather girly).

I'm not going to lie, when I'm in a relationship I like to mark it and my ideal guy would do so too. But when I'm single I just get on it it. It's one day. And I have a successful relationship with myself so why should it bother me that I'm not in a relationship?

It doesn't. And it shouldn't bother you either. So instead of weeping when you walk past the stuffed toys on your weekly shop how about you just grin about the fact that you're saving money by not buying anyone anything and go out and reap the benefits of being single.

Morag x
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